Blowjob Blog May 2006

Chicken Parties

No it's not a gathering of chickens or a party where people have to dress like chickens.

Just when we were coming to grips with Rainbow Parties, according to those in the know, a chicken party is a gathering of teenage girls perform fellatio on the boys, en masse, with their heads bobbing up and down like barnyard fowl... hence the name chicken parties.

I've heard of gobbling on cock but I don't know where they plucked this one from...

Posted: Monday 29th May 2006, 7:55 PM

To Spit Or Swallow

"Gulper" emailed me with her take on the highly debated topic of whether to spit or swallow cum when giving her boyfriend a blowjob.

She writes... "I'm an avid swallow supporter. I figure that swallowing cum is like taking cough syrup. Sure, it's a little distasteful at first, but eventually the taste will go away, and the benefits to the relationship far outweigh that tiny moment of displeasure."

I did a quick check with some male friend of mine and unsurprisingly, 80% agree with Gulper on this point. In fact, most replied that this was a question that should not even be addressed. Swallowing, they all said, is a "given".

Posted: Friday 26th May 2006, 3:11 PM

Oral Sex Survey

Over a period of two weeks in February, Elle magazine and NBC conducted an online sex survey of almost 80,000 people, half women and half men. 90 percent of the respondents were in a monogamous relationship.

One of the questions asked was "Do You Engage In Oral Sex?"

40 percent of women and men said they rarely or never give oral sex.
58 percent of men said their partner doesn't like receiving oral sex.
20 percent of women said they're not comfortable enough with their genitals to receive oral sex.
45 percent of women said they don't like performing oral sex.
21 percent of women said they’re uncomfortable with this sex act.

Food for thought...

Posted: Monday 22nd May 2006, 5:07 PM

Oral Sex Neck

"Stiff n Sore" emailed me to complain about a condition she calls "oral sex neck" that she suffers from when she gives her boyfriend head.

She says she gets a really bad neck pain that lasts for up to a day after the event.

Well, as with any sporting activity, (and giving blowjobs must surely be considered sport of some kind), if you’ve been pushing your body beyond its normal physical limits you WILL suffer from cramps and exhaustion.

HOWEVER... as with all great athletes, it's important to practice often and work through the pain barrier.

Posted: Tuesday 16th May 2006, 6:48 PM

Big Dick Blowjobs

"Big Dick" emailed me to tell me about his love of blowjobs. He also went on to tell me how big his dick is and I thought I'd share...

My Dick Is So Big...

10) ...it graduated a year ahead of me.

9) ...a homeless family lives underneath it.

8) ...there was once a movie called Godzilla vs. my dick.

7) ...we use it at parties as a limbo pole.

6) ...I was once in Ohio and got a blowjob in Tennessee.

5) ...Michael Jackson wants to build an amusement park on it.

4) ...I entered it in a big-dick contest and it came in first, second, and third.

3) ...that the head of it has only seen my balls in pictures.

2) ...I'm already fucking a girl tomorrow.

1) ...movie theaters now serve popcorn in small, medium, large, and my dick sizes.

Do you think he might be exaggerating just a little?

Posted: Friday 12th May 2006, 6:33 PM

Pink's Blowjob Skills Stink

You've gotta feel sorry for "Stupid Girls" singer Pink's husband, motorcross champion Carey Hart. She reportedly refuses to give him a blowjob and admits to being lazy in bed.

When asked about oral sex, she reportedly said: "My God, that's disgusting... I don't do that".

She went on to admit that although she is more than happy with her husband's sexual prowess she doesn't do much work in the bedroom and is "too lazy to go on top."

WTF? I'd ditch the bitch in a heartbeat and get a wife who DOES suck cock.

Posted: Monday 8th May 2006, 6:22 PM

Court Room Blowjob Banter

I had to laugh when I read this excerpt from an actual court case where a young prostitute's defence lawyer was cross-examining a vice squad police officer.

Defense Lawyer: After approaching my client what did you say?

Vice Cop: I asked her how much to get my dick sucked.

Defense Lawyer: "Dick sucked" or "blowjob?" In your statement you said...

Vice Cop: "Dick sucked." I say the same thing every time. She said 40 bucks.

Defense Lawyer: What else did you say?

Vice Cop: I told her it was always my fantasy to have two girls together, you know.

Defense Lawyer: And how long have you had this fantasy? (giggles from spectators)

Vice Cop: No, it's just, it's just what they tell us to say to get the other one to come over, you know.

The case was dismissed...

Posted: Friday 5th May 2006, 11:11 AM

Political Blow For Deputy PM

If Tracey Temple's story can be believed, it seems as if an upper lip is not the only thing British politicians have that is stiff.

Who is Tracey Temple I hear you ask?

Apparantly she's the ex-lover of John Prescott, the Deputy Prime Minister of Britain! After feeling abandoned by her colleagues and her former lover, she's sold her story about the two-year affair she had with the politician for over $600,000.

The British newspaper "The Mail on Sunday" published claims that Ms Temple regularly gave a blow job to the Deputy Prime Minister in his office and had sex in hotel rooms and at his taxpayer funded flat.

It's good to see that some politicians are human after all!

Posted: Tuesday 2nd May 2006, 3:59 PM

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